Why Is My Baby Fighting Sleep?
If your baby suddenly starts crying, arching, or resisting sleep, you’re not alone.
This is one of the most common things I hear from parents:“My baby is exhausted… but won’t go to sleep. I spend hours trying to rock or pat in the cot, ending up in feeding or co-sleeping".
Here’s why it happens
1. Overtiredness
When babies stay awake too long, their bodies release cortisol (a stress regulating hormone), making it harder to fall asleep, even if they’re exhausted. This can cause them to miss their 'sweet spot' sleep window, and get a second-wind of fussy energy.
2. Undertiredness On the flip side, if your baby hasn’t been awake long enough, they simply won’t have enough sleep pressure to settle. You're trying to fight an uphill battle. Babies need sleep pressure to go to sleep. If it's taking longer than 20 minutes to settle your baby, they're not tired enough.
3. Sleep Associations
If your baby relies on rocking, feeding, or being held to fall asleep, they may resist sleep unless those exact conditions are met. As they get older and more mobile and aware of their surroundings, these heavy-handed methods can actually start to become 'annoying'.
4. Developmental Changes
Milestones, regressions, and increased awareness can all make settling harder. Sleep isn't the priority during these times, but processing the new skill is.
So what actually helps?
✔️ Adjust wake windows ✔️ Create a consistent wind-down routine ✔️ Support independent settling (without leaving your baby to cry it out as that’s not my approach at all!).
If your baby is fighting every nap or bedtime, it’s not something you just have to “wait out.”
✨ You can start making sleep feel easier again.
Because sleep shouldn’t feel like a battle every day.
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